Bye

Today will be the last day gor this blog wif all these emotional things...later i'll hive my new blog address. 

Hurt..

Ok fine!! So, selfish!! They all always want me to take care of their feelings..but mine?? No one ever thought about it right.. And I'm still being stupid to do all these..and now this hurt is too deep..no one anymore for me to speak all these out...

Impressed?

I'm trying to impress u but u show nothing! Hurmm..

Shhh...

Still thinking of u..

This feeling~~

U're in the building beside..

Why my mind keep thinking of you?

Try to reach ur attention..

But all of them doesn't work

Try to text you but I couldn't

I'm too afraid

afraid that I'll disturb you and just make u go away..

Please, ya Allah..please..

Cool down this feeling..

Its really killing me inside out..

You can call me crazy

As the lyric..

I rather to be hurt than feels nothing at all..

Words from lips...

I just don't like all those dirty words.. Mind ur language, if u really have to say something to express out ur stress or mad, just say it in a polite way..

Lungs activated

Okey..my lungs start to making prob..

Plz behave, Auni is not here tonight and my turbuhaler also is not here..

I don't want to walk all way to ed bacause of u both..so, pls behave. Don't react to my stress..

Coughing snd wheezing is here already..

20/12/13

I just feel so lonely...

Under rain

Just feel want to standing under the rain and cry out loud...

Don't know how to say..

To have another friend is better than adding an enemy..

Kpd pembaca (kalau ada pembaca r) siapa sudi jd tmpat luahan..ataupun kenal any counselor to do so? Plz pm me..

When heart speak

Sometimes I feel like its a waste of time

*start to be selfish

Not thinking about others anymore including me...

Sometimes I feel like I am too stupid to still stick with..

But then, I will feel I am the one who are selfish

Hope this end soon...

Serabut!!

Serabut..serabut..serabut..dgn sakit pale n demam x ilg2 lg ni..huh!

Baca buku sume x masuk..kepala pn nk ikut berdenyut..adoi!!

Bosan!!!!!!

Deep effect

Short post...

Ak ni kalau dpt luka, confirm ada scar..tp sume scar ni korg kena tgk dekat2 baru nmpk...

Samalah mcm hati or perasaan ak..once ada yg mencalarkn or menyinggung..ak mmg smpan n ingat smpai bila2, tp secara lahiriahnya, ak blh act mcm xde pape..kecuali utk diorg yg tikam ak dlm2 r..

*bukan ak xnk buang perasaan benci atau noda hitam tu..aku dah try dah tp mcm ak ckp, its a scar..n parut slalu akan mengingatkn kita...

Same goes to org yg brbuat baik dgn ak..insyaAllah kalau ak mmpu, ak akan tolong semampu yg ak blh...

Oklh..bye...

It remains secret...

Its nice

But yet its not

There's hope

But yet, there's none

He already write something nice for me

But yet, I still couldn't open the page

Yet, I believe it will be wonderful..

Some woman's Dream

Tiba2 teringat kenangan lama..cintan cintun..huhu

1st guy during form5

He approaching by sending me a paper and tulis 'sijil nikah ****** & safiah'

Then, the most memorable memory ialah dia panggil ak keluar kelas(kelas tingkat 2) dan suruh aku pandang bawah..then ada 1 pokok kt bawah ni, dia trim smpai nmpk bentuk love..and dia buat sume ni dpn 1 sekolah waktu prep and everyone was looking at us..

But, mgkin xde jodoh..everything stop bila habis sekolah..baru2 ni adalah gk dia dtg approach back but i reject because skrg dia dah start merokok..n ak mmg xleh r dgn org merokok ni..nk ak semput setiap malam?? Huhu...

2nd guy 

this is the most women wanted to happened to them..malam tu ada prom nite.. N he is dressing well. After habis prom nite, we take a walk tepi tasik..actually ada unimate lain jgk tp diorg dah jln dl kt depan..then suddenly this guy melutut sblh kaki and approaching me with ayat 

'adakah ruang di hati ika(aku) untuk saya tempati?'

N at this time sume mata unimate aku dah tertancap kt kitorg..

Memang lepas dia ckp tu, ak jd *krik..krik..krik..* 

Lastly, ak ckp kt dia yg ak prlukan masa utk fikir n esoknya aku akan bgtau dia..

Lastly, jawapan aku adalah.....

Haha..oklah, ckup dl k..

Tp ingat, walaupun ak pernah couple tp ak x pernah keluar berdua k..

Dasdisdos!!!

Co ass vs HO working time

Co ass

- day 0430H - 1430H same day

- oncall 0430H - 1430H next day, no off on next day

Best part - on weekend and public holiday, only oncall people work..

Worse and best part was in O&G - working 4 days 3 nights straight, then the next day still have to come to work...

HO

- day 0600H -1800H

- oncall (or just call it night shift) 1700H-0800H next morning, might get off the next day or no off..

Weekend or public holiday, everyone has to work as usual..not for oncall only.

So, which one better?

Its about satisfaction

How I'm supposed to start this..hurmm

Kepuasan bekerja setakat ni..

1) SN and JM sume kenal ak..aku dtg pagi2 mesti diorg tegur ak..n plg best bila tgk diorg lg bersemangat nk keje bila tau ak keje dgn diorg aritu..

2) ak menjadi salah seorang kebanggaan Dr. Chee (consultant NICU). Dia sendiri ckp aku bagus buat keje n have a good attitude..just dr segi theory, masih jauh aku kena kejar. Mungkin pd sesetangah dr lain, diorg pn menjudge aku sama mcm Dr. Chee

Aku ni mmglah x suka mmbaca selagi x kena tanya..sbb tu theory aku out..tp dalam hati ni kuat rasa nk belajar n improvekan diri..tp mcm ada yg menghalang n kdg2 aku smpai rasa stress sbb xleh nk improvekn theory ak..stress tu smpai tahap psikologi aku trganggu r jgk..sape yg kenal ak, mgkin tau apa yg blh jd if x dpt kawal diri..

Bila aku decide nk ambik cuti pjg cket utk improvekn diri, sume mghalang..ckp nnt lmbt habis HO r, buang masalah..aku x kejarlah nk habiskan HO cpt2..yg aku nk is aku dpt jlnkn tanggungjawab aku dgn baik..tanggungjawab sebagai doktor. Yelah, diorg mana faham..diorg bkn kt tempat aku..diorg igt bila aku ckp ilmu aku out, kononnya ak ni rendah diri..heii, bkn akulah tu..mgkin sbb tulah aku ssh nk perbaiki diri..yelah, nnt makin berlagak r aku kalau sume ilmu ada dlm kepala aku..ntahlah..oklah..nnt smbung lg...